the heart laid bare

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the curse
Under seige
Beyond the blues
Introspect
Balloon
push
a strange distance
SWIMMING ALWAYS DOWNWARD
A ONCE-FAMILIAR LANDSCAPE
No Apology
the thunder
tinder
VERBAL PORTRAIT OF A CAT OWNER
critical shortage
the sky we thought we knew
CIRCA SOLEM
almanac
baby
dearest orlando
FIVE MONTHS
A LETTER TO THE UNDESERVING
cactus heart
would we
the fall of giants
paradise lost
Dad
after you've gone
time
a smile from the eyes
trepidation
why so cold
fix this
swallow me
untitled 8
insular
cry alone
robin
quicksand
laces
D.I.S.C.
stripped
waving goodbye
your open eyes
enemy within
mortal
untitled 4
sleepless
OUTSIDER
untitled 9
come dream with me
in the face of adversity
one word
the dark of the night
untouchable
one and one makes two
you burn me
see me
this shaken core
my lover
helen
my room
his words
foolish
rita
chalk drawings
the longest night
stupid skeleton
CLOTHES MAKETH
FIRST LASTS
STELLAR
TODAY
I WATCHED A MAN DIE TODAY
THREE WEEKS
this slippery slope
untitled 5
Arrows
First Kiss
The Talk Of Love
Nicotine
Blackout

foolish

The doors burst open as we buried you.
You should have seen it.
I don’t know why you couldn’t.
 
Maybe I’m wrong and there is a reason
Maybe there never was.
 
We weren’t friends.
I think you knew that.
We didn’t agree.
And I’m not sorry for that.
 
I am only sorry that you ever thought I didn’t care.
 
I gave it no second thought
How I looked from your eyes...
Not until you were gone.
I worry that you thought my hand was out only because he was holding your other one.
I fret, and worry
Because I too was there once
And I came back.
And I forget that not everyone can find their way back in the dark.
 
You must have felt so alone.
So lost.
I remember, now, what it was like to be lost with no map.
I remember, too late.
 
Please don’t mistake me.
I know your path was yours alone to walk.
But I am sorry that nothing I could ever say was going to be enough.
And I am sorry that you never saw, and laughed at how foolish you were
In believing that nobody cared.
 
And I am sorry
That it wasn’t until our hearts were broken open
That enough love could pour out
To make the doors burst open.
 
We came together and collectively drowned.

© mjc 20 September 2014

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Biography

Daughter, sister, aunt, godmother, friend, public servant; self-confessed hermit, confirmed cat person, sporadic baker, irreformable yarncrafter, voracious reader; occasional wit, voluble shower vocalist, frequent sacrifice on the altar of brain-to-mouth filter fails, unrepentant purveyor of puns and dad jokes, writer and poet.

I have always lived by the theory that no matter what you do for a living - if you are compelled to write, if you wake up in the night to scrawl the contents of your dreams on a notebook beside the bed, if no event in your life seems complete without you recording it, if you are drawn to comment upon the world - then you are a writer.

These are my words.