foolish
The doors burst open as we buried you.
You should have seen it.
I don’t know why you couldn’t.
Maybe I’m wrong and there is a reason
Maybe there never was.
We weren’t friends.
I think you knew that.
We didn’t agree.
And I’m not sorry for that.
I am only sorry that you ever thought I didn’t care.
I gave it no second thought
How I looked from your eyes...
Not until you were gone.
I worry that you thought my hand was out only because he was holding your other one.
I fret, and worry
Because I too was there once
And I came back.
And I forget that not everyone can find their way back in the dark.
You must have felt so alone.
So lost.
I remember, now, what it was like to be lost with no map.
I remember, too late.
Please don’t mistake me.
I know your path was yours alone to walk.
But I am sorry that nothing I could ever say was going to be enough.
And I am sorry that you never saw, and laughed at how foolish you were
In believing that nobody cared.
And I am sorry
That it wasn’t until our hearts were broken open
That enough love could pour out
To make the doors burst open.
We came together and collectively drowned.
© mjc 20 September 2014
